For the record, I'm a ''feelings'' writer. If you haven't figured it out yet.



This week has been amazing, I have been out every night with friends and I miss that. Now i'm heading back to camp for another week.. and I'm sad to say, but I'm not really looking forward to it. Things just aren't that great at camp, and I just don't want to be there. This place, for the past 2 years, has been more than a job for me. It was a place where I could just be me and not worry. It was a place where I was free from everything back home and I was actually happy. I was with amazing people for 6 weeks straight and I loved every minute of it.

Don't get me wrong, I still have friends there, and i still love every minute that I am with them. We have an awesome time, but there is still times when things just aren't right. Things that I'm not sure if I should even try to change anymore. I know that some things are meant to be broken, and you are supposed to smile because you got the chance to experience them and yadda yadda yaddda, but what if I don't want those things to stay broken? I keep running circles in my head wondering if I should try everything I can to be his friend, or if I should just let it be.

The thing is, things aren't okay. As much as I say they are, I think that I'm only trying to fool myself. I don't want to have this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach when I think of everything going on. I don't want to feel like I'm ruining anything for anyone.

So.. if you read this, (you know who you are) I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry if I've done something wrong. Please understand that all I want is to be your friend, I honestly do not have any other feelings for you than that. Your friendship means so much to me, but I can't fix it alone. I can't go on pretending any longer.